That "gut feeling"

This is me and my baby boy just over 12 months ago. Little did I know that night I would suffer brain trauma, a stroke. 

It came on hard and fast and never went away. 

I am doing much better, but it’s still a long road ahead. And I am ok, the sensation is debilitating I want to scream with pain and pressure on my brain but I manage with my techniques. 

Not only is it invisible symptoms I suffer but I had such a lack of comprehension for the best part of 13 months. I simply couldn’t understand a sentence or when I read a text message or book, sometimes I pretended I knew or I would have to sit there and analyse it for days to decipher it. This made it bloody hard starting a business but it wasn’t going to get in my way because I made the decision to not be a victim. 

The big question, why did this happen? Why did I have a stroke? 

To be honest, we will never truly know the cause. However, when I connect the dots and listen to my body, my intuition, this is what makes sense.

After having my baby, my GP (at the time!) was for some reason really forcing me to take the pill, get the “rod”, get this in my uterus and that. I was flat out against it and I always have been. 

A few months after I gave birth, I started reading a book about balancing my hormones and gut health - I had severe gut health issues and it got worse postnatal. 

So here I was reading a book about our body, learning of hormones estrogen and what the contraceptive pill actually is, it’s carcinogenic, which means it’s deadly. Research trials stopped years and years and years ago because they caused cancer and the women were dying. It detailed HRT (hormone replacement therapy for women after menopause) and all these other things that we are led to believe are “good for us”. In no way is it good to put a synthetic drug in your body to mimic what our system is meant to do! Too much estrogen and progesterone cause cancer, stroke, blood clots and a shit load more issues. 

The pill is not safe for anyone over 30, the risk of a stroke is so much higher but do doctors tell us that? Do they sit there and seriously discuss the risks? It’s more than a risk, it’s putting your life in danger! Why do we put so much faith in the medical system without out questioning it? 

My doctor kept hounding me to take the pill, “it’s not safe to get pregnant again so soon” and she got me good, on a bad day when I went to see her for my other issues of my sore gut and I left with a prescription for the pill. 

I asked my doctor, “how do you know this is the correct pill for me?”

Doctor said: “you’ve been in it before it’s pretty generic”. 

I said: “yeah when I was a teenager! So much has changed. I’ve had a baby! I am now in my 30’s!” 

Doctor said: “it’s fine, it’s a low dose” 

I said: “should I do a blood test or something to see where my hormone levels are at?”

Doctor said: “no you’ll be fine”

And so, I TRUSTED my doctor. Surely she was correct? Even though I was reading a book about how the pill is DEADLY, I still walked away in my sickly, painful state with a prescription ready to go fulfil it. 

Something inside me was telling me not to take the pill. I was having an internal battle. But I was just too sick, I just wanted to get the doctor off my case and I thought she is obviously very skilled, she knows what is safe for me, surely! 

The 3 things deep down I know, contributed to having a stroke: 

  1. I took the pill for 2 months, and something inside me kept telling me to stop taking it. 
  2. Then we flew to Bali for a family holiday. Flying can cause blood clots too, immobile for long period of time in a cramped space.
  3. Stress! This guy can do severe damage. Cortisol the stress hormone can be layers, years and years of stress build up and it does not go away easily. 

Stress can look like anything, not getting enough sleep, waking up for a crying baby, a job you despise, a high pressure situation, a family feud, being too hard on yourself, a bad diet of processed foods, feeling pressure of society anything and everything can contribute to stress, and if you don’t know how to manage it properly.. well that’s a recipe for disaster. 

I should have listened to my (very sick) gut, telling me not to do this! There are many books and research out there that detail the gut-brain connection.

Was I also suffering something inside my gut that was a contributing factor to this situation? We will never know! It was also my intuition speaking to me, I kept dismissing it. 

This is what you need to be aware of and realise:

  • Do NOT take the pill or any synthetic hormones. Or any type of pill ever again! There is no magic fix and you should seek proper help for any issues, don’t give up and settle because it gets too hard. 
  • Listen to your gut, your intuition. When you get that feeling you can’t shake, that’s there for a reason! Listen to it! 
  • Do your own research! We cannot accept to believe the medical system is doing the right thing by us. They have a job to do, ‘fix’ you with a pill. And it comes from a big pharmaceutical company that makes shit loads of money. Now the medical system does have its place with accidents, broken bones and lifesaving surgery and more, however, we shouldn’t be looking for a quick fix to health problems nor should we believe a synthetic pill of any sort can make us healthy. 
  • Look at the whole picture, diet, exercise and lifestyle. Find a functional doctor that is willing to investigate your health issues. Any sort of discomfort is an issue! No matter how big or small, it will lead to something bigger and sometimes irreversible if we don’t manage it. 

This is why self-care and balance is so important! We still need our stress hormone cortisol, it’s what makes us get out of bed in the morning but we need to keep it in check. 

I am now stuck in a fight or flight kind of mode, my body is overproducing the stress hormone and it’s stuck in a vicious cycle. This has a huge effect on my adrenal system and I am suffering extreme adrenal fatigue. Adrenal fatigue is serious yet it’s not a recognised diagnosis by our mainstream medical system. 

Instead of listing the things that are wrong, I will start on what's right. I am feeling much better, I have accelerated my recovery with holistic techniques and alternative medicine (I will detail what this looks like in my next blog post). I have enhanced my lifestyle and I am getting so much more out of life. I found my purpose and how I can contribute to this world in a positive way. 

My hope is that no-one has to suffer severe trauma to wake up and realise what a healthy, balanced lifestyle should look like. We can’t look after anyone else if we don’t look after ourselves first and foremost. 

Take care, self-care!

With Love, 

Carla x